Chuck (charlesofcamden) wrote,

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. . . And I Quote . . .

I’m very fond of a certain type of quote that frequently arises in the sports world. I’m not talking about inspirational speeches, trash talking, or declarations of where the winning quarterback will be going now that he’s won the Super Bowl. I’m talking about humorous inadvertent statements. Of course, the archetype of these would have to be the many quotes attributed to Yogi Berra, although Berra-isms, funny as they sometimes are, have begun to leave me a little cold for two reasons: 1) Most of the Berra-isms I read were not said by Yogi Berra, or at least weren’t said by him first; and 2) Berra himself is in on the joke and often makes statements with intentionally skewed phrasing, thus robbing the quote of any claim to ingenuousness.

All of this was brought to mind by a quote I read in today’s Chicago Sun-Times in Ron Rapoport’s column. He was talking about the Carolina Panthers’ recent playoff game victory over the Chicago Bears. And I quote:
My favorite comment on the Panthers’ victory, though, came from Carolina offensive coordinator Dan Henning, who said, “On a scale of 1 to 10, I’d give it an A-plus.”

Man, that’s good stuff!

A few other favorites I’ve heard over the years –
A baseball player was complaining about a pitcher who he thought was throwing at him, thus endangering his health and livelihood. He summed up his concerns by pointing out, “Hey, I’m the father of five or six kids!”

A football player wanted to express how his team’s fortunes had improved by declaring, “We’ve got it turned around 360 degrees!”

There was a hockey coach who bemoaned his team’s lack of success thusly: “We can’t win at home, and we can’t win on the road. My failure as a coach is that I can’t think of anyplace else for us to play!” Not really a misstatement; he said precisely what he meant to say, but it’s a good line anyway.

Finally, I once won a coffee mug from the Detroit Free Press for this one. They asked readers to send in their favorite quotes from local sportscasters. I sent in this, which I’d heard uttered by Al Kaline during the broadcast of a Detroit Tigers game. Al was talking to fellow broadcaster George Kell about some fundamental of baseball that he thought the young players needed to bear in mind. “George, I’ve said this so many times, it’s almost like I’m repeating myself!”

Well, that one may not have been the funniest sports quote ever, but it won me a stylish coffee mug emblazoned with the Free Press logo, so it works for me!

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