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It is written

Posted on 2006.04.04 at 01:23
Current Mood: indescribable
Current Music: Thank You For Being a Friend - Andrew Gold
If you spend a lot of time with me (and let’s face it; you know you want to), you will observe that I’m fond of old sayings, maxims, and other assorted bon mots. Like most of the knowledge in my brain, these phrases are not arranged in any kind of logical or accessible order; they generally bubble up to the conscious level only when a specific event evokes them. But today, I’m going to present a modest list of some sayings I found very enjoyable. These have been culled from a much longer list that someone sent me. Some of them I’d heard before and some were new to me, but I think there’s some quality blather in this collection!

• The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
• Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.
• It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
• Always remember you are unique – just like everyone else.
• Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away, and you have their shoes.
• Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
• No one is listening until you fart.
• There is a fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness”.
• No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
• Never miss a good chance to shut up.
• Duct tape is like the Force – It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

And while we're talking about my affinity for sayings and suchlike, please note that you should always feel free to pass such things along to me! Thank you!


empresskatums at 2006-04-04 13:32 (UTC) (Link)
No quality words to pass on to you, but thanks for giving me a laugh this morning!
(Anonymous) at 2006-04-29 02:02 (UTC) (Link)
This might be tres facile for this readership, but one of my faves is:

"Eschew obfuscation; apotheosize disambiguation!"


Bro' Dan
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