Chuck (charlesofcamden) wrote,

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The Caper Caper

I walked into Einstein Brothers Bagels today and ordered an asiago cheese bagel with lox, cream cheese, tomato, onion, and capers. Ah, capers! The secret ingredient of this particular sandwich, as far as I’m concerned. Twenty years ago, I couldn’t have described the appearance or flavor of a caper if the Nazis had held a gun to my head (though I’d at least heard of them, which is more than I could have said for asiago cheese).

I was the only person in line at the time, so both of the people behind the counter helped to put my order together. It quickly became apparent that there was a problem – they were out of capers! Well, not completely out, but one of the workers, a short wiry Hispanic fellow who looked as if he could have kicked my ass without breaking a sweat, had to go into the back room to fetch a new jarful. I wasn’t watching them too closely while this was going on, but Wiry Guy suddenly appeared before me, holding a big shiny jar of capers. “Hey amigo,” he said with a smile, “wanna do us both a favor?” He couldn’t get the jar open! This guy, who I still think could kick my ass, couldn’t generate the requisite leverage to get this jar open! Well, I am 6’2” (6’4” in heels) with a 37-inch sleeve, which means that I can generate some leverage, and I am proud to say that I easily opened the jar. Wiry Guy carried the jar back to the prep area, then turned and called out, “Never underestimate the power of a man who wants his capers!”

I smiled and called back, “I just wanted them more than you did!”

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