Chuck (charlesofcamden) wrote,

  • Mood:
  • Music:


The following is a song I didn't write, nor could I have. It was sent to me by my friend Nilu, who moved here with her family from Iran when she was a very little girl (after the Shah was deposed and replaced by the Ayatollah Khomeni, a lot of folks who didn't dig living under strict Islamic rule got the heck out of there). It's done to the tune of Alanis Morrisette's "Isn't It Ironic." I just want to say that I love this, even though I understand very little of it, and in spite of the fact that it ends with a poke at Americans. I have no trouble looking past that, because the thing I love about it is that it is a fluffy piece of satiric verse written (presumably) by an Iranian-American, and it unavoidably creates an image of that type of person that flies in the face of the stereotypes a lot of people might have about such immigrants -- it turns out that they have the same capacity for writing silly shit that anybody else might have. So this is no lyric for the ages, nor is my observation so very profound, but on the other hand, you've probably never seen anything quite like this:

Isn't It Iranic

A Persian Version of Alanis Morrisette's "Isn't it Ironic" Vocal to be accompanied by santour and domback.
May be accompanied by 1-2 flabby belly dancers; and/or 1 barefoot gay Iranian male dancer waving handkerchief.

Isn't it Iranic, don't you think

It's like rain - on your convertible benz
It's like Farhad does your hair but you still have split ends
It's like a black fly in the doogh you just drank
It's one more taroff when you've already thanked

It's like counting pennies when you own an estate
It's when your blind date is four hours late
It's like chewing kabob that you notice is pink
It's when another bald dentist sends you a wink

Isn't it Iranic, don't you think
It's like too Iranic...yeah I really do think

It's like waiting for hours in the buffet line
It's a shab-eh Shabbat and you forgot to buy wine
It's like meeting your spouse on your wedding date
It's like a catered briss when you can't find a plate

It's like Elat market running out of lavash
It's like 90 degrees out, but your grandma cooks awsh
It's when you want to swim, but you've straightened your curls
It's like your husband sulking that you've only had girls

It's an arousee without Martique to sing
It's a namzadee without a huge emerald ring
It's like paying retail and not a cheap wholesale price
It's like eating choresht without any rice

It's a balding husband with hair on his back
It's denying your blonde hair really is black
It's a great nose job except you can't breathe
It's a madar-shooar who demands you conceive

Isn't it Iranic, don't you think
Isn't it Iranic, don't Americans stink?
It's like too Iranic...yeah I really think...

  • 2020 Puzzle Solution

    There have been some slowdowns in mail delivery of late, so if you haven't received yours, let me know and I can resend it.

  • Mid-Year Puzzle Solution

    If you're looking for the puzzle, scroll down to the entry below this one.

  • Puzzle Time!

    Hello and welcome to Chuck Greenia’s Special Crossword Puzzle for Shut-Ins, 2020 Edition! NOTE: You can print this out from here if you want, but…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.